Yes, yes I did. I said I was going to post this hilarious story from one of my groups to my blog, and in my slothfulness, I forgot...
Dee, this is for you :)
BANNED FROM WALMART.....
This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.
Mrs. Sousley insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.
Unfortunately, Mr. Sousley was like most men--he found shopping boring and
preferred to get in and get out.
Equally unfortunate, Mrs. Sousley was like most women--she loved to
browse. One day Mrs. Sousley received the following letter from her local
Dear Mrs. Sousley,
Over the past six months, your husband, Shawn Sousley has been causing
quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be
forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.
Sousley are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance
1. March 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's
carts when they weren't looking.
2 . April 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
3. April 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
4. April 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.'
5. May 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on
6. June 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. July 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other
shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from
the bedding department.
8. July 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and
screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. August 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror
while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming
the ' Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by
using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
And last, but not least ..
15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'